Black and White

by Jason Alan

I am seriously fucking tired of the versus mentality of the human race. Us versus them, blacks against whites, dark skin versus light skin, Christians fighting Muslims, Mexicans hating Guatemalans, men versus women, atheists against agnostics, Jews versus Jesus, capitalism versus socialism, rich against poor, republicans versus democrats, congress versus progress, bloods versus crips, breeders against faggots, Coke versus Pepsi, Kramer vs. Kramer, the dindus versus the doodoos, whatever the fuck it is.

It’s time we all start acting as cells inhabiting the same body. Too many of us are goddamn viruses, constantly attacking not only the host but each other as well, and it’s not good for anyone. And frankly, I’m sick of it all.

There’s a war on women, a war on drugs, a war on terror, a war on freedom, a war in Africa, a war in the middle east, religious wars, a war on Christmas, race wars, war and peace, Warren Buffett, Warren G, cake wars, star wars, the war of the roses, a war of attrition, war of the worlds, game of war, et cetera.

Bloody hell, when is enough going to be enough? I can’t watch or read the news any more because the best that comes from it is a shake of my head and a long, deep sigh. The atrocities people commit on a daily basis are depressing, disappointing and downright infuriating. And I, for one, shall not stand for it. I, as a living, breathing, thinking, creative mammal with opposable thumbs, I refuse to stand for this utter nonsense any longer. So I will sit, right here, and complain, and drink another beer. Why? Because I’m an alcoh… uh, wait, because I’m an American, and that’s what we do. Good night, retards. And God bless. Cunts.